You can’t make somebody care.
All throughout my life I have encountered people at various stages of the caring spectrum. From over privileged friends who bask in attention and love, too self centered to realize how fortunate they are. To the forgotten young soldier overseas, who is constantly offering up gifts and services in hopes of someone reciprocating affection. The old lady who has become invisible in her family, drowned out by trendy electronics, new babies, and the changing times. The young girl with the dark secret, hiding her pain with loud laughter and smiles while her father insists that she is okay, that she forgot. The lonely housewife who has become a doormat in her family, constantly criticized and ridiculed but too afraid to leave behind the only thing she knows. And the many depressed, drowning in their own lives.
We all share this need to be loved and cared for. For people to pay attention, ask questions, and remember things about us so that we know that we matter. And it hurts when we get anything less than that. Is there a secret to being worthy of being cared about? Some magic formula? Does it have to do with how interesting you are, or likeable? If you were better-looking would you be cared about more? Or if you were smarter? Or more successful?
I don’t have an answer for that. I don’t know why there are some people that have millions ogling what they wear, when their birthday is and what they did this weekend; and some people that can’t even get a visitor at the hospital. I don’t know if it has to do with who you happen to be related to, who you know, or who you work for.
But what I do know is this. Everybody needs to be cared about. Babies, if they are not touched enough right after birth die. The elderly, if not shown enough care and attention get bitter. Children have behavioral problems. Adults go into depression. We all need somebody to care about us. I can’t say that everybody will, or that even many will, but I do want to say that there are people out there that do care. In fact, sometimes it is complete strangers that show more caring and compassion than the people you have known your whole life. It is up to us to find the people that really care about us and surround ourselves with them. To never let them go, because a person like that is a gem.
Maybe, if we become that person there will be more of those in the world. Spread the love, people.